How to Embrace Your Shadow Self and Live Authentically

What is a shadow self? First, we’ll discuss the literal meaning. When we look at a shadow, without trying to make something spiritual out of it, what do you think of?

A shadow is a part of something, light creates shadow. We notice that the shadow is not static, it’s in motion. It moves as you move, as the sun moves, it can grow bigger or smaller, longer or wider, it just depends upon illumination.

Shadow Self Meaning

The history of this term is with Carl Jung, from the psychological perspective he came up with the term, shadow self, being that part of the individual’s construct which the ego wishes to repress, degrade or try to hide with a cloak as if it’s not there, or not part of the consciousness of that person. Therefore, having it be a reflection of a person that is concealed behind a person.

Why we must reveal, and not conceal our Shadow Self

The point made by a lot of psychologists in this, by hiding this part of us is not healthy – that we’re not living an authentic life if we are not coming to grips with what our shadow selves really are. With plant medicine, I have heard and personally experienced in my one ayahuasca journey, that these things come up a lot of the time, the analogies of the shadow self and working through parts of yourself that wish to come up so that you’re aware of them is a part of that process to set yourself free so that subconsciously you’re doing anything to sabotage yourself. You’re at least doing it consciously – which is a big step. What I’ve noticed is that in our lives we keep making the same mistakes and we’re sort of oblivious not knowing what they don’t know. So, how do we handle this?

How do Shadow Selves Form?

A heavy contributor to shadows ae a result of relationships. Relationships give us the ability to sense that greater part of ourselves and expand and allow that true self to really shine and be authentic. Or, there are options. You can potentially become something else that’s not your authentic self just to please someone, to feel that sense of acceptance, receiving attention, and feel loved by someone. These are all very normal human qualities that we’re searching for.

Where might these relationships begin developing that shadow self? In our childhoods, we think of the people who mean everything to us like our parents or immediate family. As children, we want to please them and we learn quickly how to adapt to please them. If our parent’s behavior is not in line with our authentic self, that we decided to come into this world to be and a big theme of our life is unwinding that energy and rewinding it up into an authentic self. So, you could be a playful spirit entering this world and perhaps you’re meant to be an actor or a performer of some kind.

Understanding your Shadow Self

Sometimes, it can be challenging if we’re born to parents who believe we should be seen and not hard and this part of us is repressed. It’s not the fault of the parents – there is no training manual before we embark on this journey of parenthood. Especially if we go back historically, they just didn’t know better and we’re working with very 3D elements in the world of how a child should behave and they should have manners and discipline so that means that they’ll do well in this world. While, at the same time, the child’s heart is being broken by being compressed. We tend to hold on to these childhood experiences and a lot of times still into adulthood and the old age we still hold on to these shadow selves.

Live Authentically and embrace your Shadow Self

Practically speaking, I could go through everyone in my life –  if I wished to do a bit of an exercise with this shadow work. I could simply ask the question; how do I wish to perceive them? And, how do I wish for them to perceive me? It’s a little bit different with every single person in your life because there’s a certain energy that mixes with each individual where the two of you form your own being, so to speak – your energies mix. When you’re with your friends you merge your worlds and your energies’ make something special. At some point, if they’re your good friends, hopefully, that part of you that is showing is a very excited and passionate part of you to share which should be reciprocated. You can see from your experiences that when you’re with certain people you like to share different aspects of yourself with them because they resonate with it. You can take stock, honestly, with yourself and ask, where is my relationship with this person now, and what’s my preference? Is there a gap between them and where I am now? What is my preference is? That’s bringing this analogy of this shadow to the surface in a super practical way that’s 5D.

The second part of it is realizing that I am that and that I wish to be seen as that right now. There is nothing holding you back from being that right now with every relationship and the world shifts when you decide that – period. You just have to hold fast onto who you wish to be. You always have this “tool” of preference at your disposal and it doesn’t have to be this sinister, dark thing that’s plaguing you, and you can’t figure it out and you’re trying to do different things to bring it out because it’s not that complicated. Here’s a tip, rather focus on getting in touch with how you feel as opposed to how you think you should be. That is applying expectation on yourself and others and that is leading you to disappointment and you are not living your authentic self.

Your shadow self is part of you

Staying true to who you really are and not conforming for whatever reason, or giving in to temptation, is such a human thing to do – to please others. How many of you are people pleasers? It seems to be a natural suppression of your heart to please others. The challenge that we get into in this human experience is we put ourselves into these environments where we’re pleasing others and that energy isn’t productive in what it’s doing and the energy is not an even exchange. When we get energetic imbalances that’s when we go a little awry with our spiritual circuitry. One vibration is faster than the other and when they come together, they will collide.

Living in 5D

I want to be able to create my life in a very 5D way and I want to be very conscious of old ways of thinking that I have individually, or that the institutions or the collective have. I want to be able to see it and I don’t want it to disappear. I want to know it’s there and I want to be able to select the parallel version of that that is the 5D version. I want that to manifest isn’t the way that I eat, the way that I exercise, the way that I interact with people or concepts, the way that I listen to my higher self, and how it enables me to contribute to the collective. Those are just a few ways by which I want to live. There might be some parts of me that are in the 3D world that I need to figure out and work through and that is called our shadow self.

I often find myself resisting that temptation to just agree and conform to 3D standards just because that’s how it’s done. Being a complimentary being to where when I see something about someone, and I admire an action that they took. I feel confident to complement their action, to make sure that they notice what they’ve done so that there’s a feedback loop, a 5D feedback loop, that reinforces the positive, healthy behavior of a fellow earth being, so that they’re more in line with their feedback loop and that positive energy reverberates with them and they continue to do more. In this 3D world, criticism is readily available. We go on to Twitter or Instagram and we put up opinions and then boom! Criticism. Or as we walk down the street people give criticism. But, more often than not, people are expressing this criticism and not the compliments. We as human beings are almost losing the art of compliments.

Things to remember about your shadow self

The rule for me when I’m observing something and I hear the voice inside saying, wow! That was impressive. I have made my feedback loop automatic and complementary. There isn’t a decision of authenticity. There is also peril in this in the way that you can question yourself and your own authenticity and you can repress yourself by doing so. This is something we need to watch or pay attention to. I would rather air on the side of overextending than under-extending. There are very few people who are very complimentary.

People are more in their own worlds, grounded in their heads not being observant of others and that’s part of the society that we’re undergoing right now and they’re questioning other people to see if they share the same belief systems and views and they’re not ready to give out compliments right away because they want to suss those people out, to see if they’re on the same team. When you are helping someone with their positive feedback loop, complimenting and acknowledging something you appreciate of them that you have observed, you’re also getting back a vibration escrow. What you give out into the universe you get back. The positive energy that you’re getting you might not feel right away. Therefore, don’t expect a secondary compliment from the person you are dealing with right away – don’t go fishing for compliments.

Key Takeaways

So how do you embrace your shadow? The least shadow is when the sun is over-head and at its brightest. So, you must let your light shine brighter so your shadows can’t be present. Letting your light shine also means working on yourself, those negative aspects our ego likes to hide away – bring them to the light so the shadow dissipates. Be real with yourself, because everyone has a shadow self.

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FAQs

What is your shadow self?

A shadow self is the version of you which our ego likes to hide away or disguise with a mask. It is the less desirable side that contradicts the idea of our perfect self who has no issues seemingly. It is a term created by Carl Jung, as a way to describe the face people use in the outside world and our true face introspectively.

Why must we deal with our shadow self?

By hiding certain aspects of ourselves we are suppressing our authentic self. This will fester and negative behaviors will arise from us. If we deny ourselves our true interests in this earthly world, the interests which we chose to bring into this life with us, our energy will not flow beneficially.

How do we bring our Shadow Selves to the Light?

Our Shadow selves are only hidden because our ego, which is created according to societal norms, deems those aspects of ourselves less desirable. If we choose to live a life that is authentic without judging ourselves and rather spending time with people who resonate positively with us, we will be less afraid to face our so-called demons. By simply looking at our negative qualities and seeing them for what they are – a part of you – and not this terrible thing, your shadows start to seem less intimidating and more acceptable. Eventually, they will cease to be.